lost and safe

Already There/Drugs Don’t Work

Going to the mountains today.    I will be hiking the first mile or so of the Appalachian Trail and pitching camp for the weekend with two very close friends.  Lost my job last week, and have been trying my best to not be scared silly by the fact that I now have no money and no job.  I’ve found the best way is to simply keep designing, keep reading, and continuously pushing my mind to stay active.  If there’s one thing I’ve realized about having a steady job that is easy (and that you are quite good at), it’s that I allow my brain to become inactive.  I fall into a pattern of non-usage very easily that is quite difficult to get out of.

Keeping my focus wide, constantly pulling myself from the edge of depression, and “staying positive” has been one of the most difficult balancing acts I’ve had to learn yet.  There is still the very real possibility that I won’t be able to pay rent, pay bills, buy food, or sustain any of the other modern inconveniences.  But simultaneously, there are so many chances for good, beautiful things to happen that I’m trying my best to stay receptive.

Since I’ve had so much free time, I’ve been reading everything my eyes can take in.  I’m currently on Using Your Brain for a Change by Richard Bandler.  It was a gift from a friend, and I thank him silently every time I open the book.  Add to that my recent discovery that the sounds of The Verve are so beautiful when listened to at a low volume.  A Storm In Heaven has managed to quite the perfect storm roiling within, affording me a peace of mind I’ve not experienced in so long.

I’ve heard some recommend a 5.1 surround setup at high volume, with lots of marijuana, but I’m to broke for any of that right now.

I’ve found that my mind fills in the gaps just fine.

Filed under: Acquire Knowledge & Understanding, Missives, , , , ,

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